-Kate Lucy Angeloni
I love this. Kate is my sister's fiance. I live with them and I see and interact with both of them everyday. And yes, this means that my sister is gay. I love her. I always will. She is more than her sexuality. She is a person. So is Kate. I'm not trying to say that I have never used the term "gay" as derogatory. I have. I apologize for every time I have said anything like that. Over the past few years I have changed my views and I feel that I am a better person for that.
Gay Marriage.I wonder when we will have equality for all. What is so wrong with marrying the person that you love? I don't see anything wrong with that. But we constantly hear these arguments that if we let gay people get married, our society will crumble and then people will marry animals. BULLSHIT. What is so wrong with being gay? I am proud knowing that I support gay people. What happened to the phrase "All Men Are Created Equal"? In our country's short history, we have dealt with this before and we evolved. I'm not trying to say that slavery is on the same ground as gay marriage. But they are the same in denying our citizens the ability to marry the one they love, no matter if they are gay or straight. Jayme [my sister] and Kate will be getting married this December 14th. They are traveling to Iowa to get married. I am happy for them. I want to be there for them. What I hate about the entire situation is that to get married they are forced to travel 600 miles to do so. And their marriage will not be legally recognized in the state they we reside in. I find it strange that a conservative state like Iowa has legalized gay marriage, and the state who's capital has one of the largest gay populations in the country. The cover of this month's 614 Magazine reads "Why is Columbus So GAY?" I read this article in its entirety and it amazed me. The amount of money that the city and state makes from the gay population here is in the BILLIONS. Let's think about this. Billions of dollars are spent every year in Columbus by gay people. Now let's imagine that the stat legalizes gay marriage. This would cause a migration to Ohio and would also help erase the debt that we have in our state. More people=more jobs=more money. It is a simple way to help our state move out of debt and into surplus.
Now onto Marriage. Marriage is not what it used to be. Marriages used to be arranged for mutual gain between two families. It was more of a financial and survival method than anything else. Marriage began to move away from arrangements towards marrying the person you wanted to, and the person you loved. First it was conservative. Virginity was held in high regards and it was common practice to remind chaste until marriage. And when people wed, they did so for life. As we have moved along, it is becoming more and more common to get divorced. Why? People cheat. People lie. People try to hide their secrets. Personally, there is just too much effort involved in having two lives with two families in two different areas in the country. I feel that if you can't be honest with the person, then you do not love them and you have no business doing that to them. More and more couples are living together before they get married. I find this is more practical than getting married fast then getting divorced. You get to be immersed with the person and learn everything about then and the two of you will discover that if you can live with the person for the rest of your life. This is where gay marriage comes in. Gay couples live together. They live together longer than some couples stay married. Why? Because until the last decade, they were not legally allowed to be married in this country. Gay couples are very committed and monogamous. Why is this? Even today it is difficult for some people to come out and let people they love know that they are gay. While there are more publicly gay people, they are still outnumbered by heterosexual people. Now I'm not saying that gay people don't cheat because there are less gay people in the world. I believe that they are more committed to working out any and all issues that they encounter. They take the extra steps needed to stay committed. Plain and simple. Straight couples are lazy by comparison. It seems that the couple operate like this: Get together, figure everything else out later. Why take the time to learn about the person; what they're like, what they love to do, and everything else that is needed to really know a person, good or bad. Let's just fuck. If the guy can get in the girl's pants, why get to know her? They way he sees it, I can get laid consistently, and if I find something I don't like, I can bail if it outweighs the sex. Now I'm not saying that all gay people are in committed, long term relationships without their problems. I know some gay people who have slept with a multitude of people. I'm not saying that that is wrong. Just not the lifestyle I have chosen for myself. I feel that as long as you are safe and take the necessary precautions, then do what you want. It just seems that gay marriage will destroy how we perceive marriage. It will take it back to earlier days of marrying for love when divorce was rare and the couples were committed to each other. Our society has turned marriage into a joke. Let's run off and get married in Las Vegas at a drive through wedding chapel, and then get divorced a week later. Or in the case of a famous singer, a day later. Shit like that is tearing apart the ideals behind marriage. The ideals are to bind two people together for life and for them to start a family. Marriage was a milestone in one's life. It was seen as the Holy Grail of relationships. It was special. You find someone that you love so much that you are willing to commit and spend the rest of your life with this one person. Then you love the person so much that you want to create life with them. That has all gone to waste, for the most part. And it is because of this that I personally have mixed reactions to marriage and engagements. On one hand, I am feeling like I am being left behind when another friend gets engaged. But then I am so happy for some people when they do make the commitment and I know that they are two great people who love each other. Then there are some friends of mine who seem to get engaged and married in a very short time. Or they are engaged to people that they physically can't spend time with. It confuses me. If I was engaged, I would want to spend a lot of time with that person. This also comes from my main experience with marriage; my parents will be celebrating 31 years of marriage this August. I know that is not the case with a lot of people. I know that people do live with the experience of divorce, sometimes at a young age. This is what has helped shape the way that marriage is viewed today.
I support gay marriage. I always have, and I always will. I do hope that I am able to be there for Jayme and Kate, and I do hope that someday my parents accept the fact that she is gay, and that she is still the same person, and that she is happy. Jayme does not need their approval. I hope that they come to realize that she is still their daughter, and gayness is not a disease and that she is the same sister I have always had. She wants your approval. I know that a person being gay is not something that you grew up with, and it may not be something that you believe in, but please just understand and know that it is not going to change her mind. She loves Kate, and I see that everyday. I know that Kate loves Jayme. I hope that I can someday find someone that I love as much as they love each other. Jayme and Kate: I don't know if you will ever read this, but if you do, just know that you two give me faith in people and give me hope that I will find someone to love like you two love each other
Well said, Thissen.
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