List: Lyrics

I have been thinking over the past few days, and I think this is where I am at with this list of my favorite lyrics from songs. The issue is, there are sooo many to choose from. But I have narrowed it down to ten; and these are in no particular order.

Daisy by Brand New: Well if we take all these things and we bury them fast
And we'll pray that they turn to seeds, to roots and then grass
It'd be all right, it's all right, it'd be easier that way
Or if the sky opened up and started pouring rain
Like you knew he was trying to start things over again
It'd be all right, it's all right, it'd be easier that way.

Zero-Sum by Nine Inch Nails: Shame on us, doomed from the start
May God have mercy on our dirty little hearts
Shame on us for all we have done
And all we ever were. Just zeroes and ones

Distraction by Angels and Airwaves: There’s a field nearby
With words written in stone
My love will not die
Please let it be known
This place is dead
It echoes through town
There isn’t one voice
I haven’t heard a sound
The planes flew in
Their bombs did too
The city fell flat
The fires, they grew
When the smoke comes in
It’ll color this town
But I’ll still have you
So I’ll say it aloud

The Good Left Undone by Rise Against: All because of you,
I believe in angels.
Not the kind with wings,
No, not the kind with halos,
The kind that bring you home,
When home becomes a strange place.
I’ll follow your voice,
All you have to do is shout it out.

The Willing Well IV: The Final Cut by Coheed and Cambria: Will they ever measure up
To the way you left me?
Here by the roadside
The bloodiest cadaver
Marked in your words:
I'm the joke,
I'm the bastard

Dirty Business by The Dresden Dolls: She's the kind of girl who gets her slings and arrows from the dumpster
The kind who tell you she's bipolar just to make you trust her
She's the kind of girl who leaves out condoms on the bedroom dresser
Just to make you jealous of the men she fucked before you met her

…And We All Have A Hell by From First To Last: Every day gets worse, 
Locked in a vice my thoughts perverse 
You must wonder why I look at you that way (that way)
Tonight I'll make my way into your house 
I must; I'm lusting for your body 
Skin looks tight, think I just might have 
To take a bite, but I know one will turn 
To three or four or more my little whore 

Dear God by Avenged Sevenfold: Dear God the only thing I ask of you is
to hold her when I'm not around
when I'm much too far away
We all need that person who can be true to you
But I left her when I found her
And now I wish I'd stayed
'Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired
I'm missing you again oh no
Once again

All The Rage by Funeral For a Friend: I'm sick and I'm tired of always being the good guy

Soul on Fire by HIM: We are like the living dead
Sacrificing all we have
For a frozen heart and a soul on fire

So there it is. My ten favorite lyrics from songs. I wanna know what your favorites are from this list, and feel free to comment your favorite lyrics. 

Don't mind me, the tequila is doing the talking...

Merry Christmas Everyone!

I have a lot to be thankful for this holiday season. I have family and friends who love me.  I have a job which I love. I am healthy and currently well rested. The gift exchange for the family will begin once mother and father return from Christmas Mass.

Now onward and upward. I am looking forward to the New Year. This past year has been a little rough at times. But it has only made me a better person. Earlier this year, I made my New Year’s Resolution. My resolution was to gauge my ears to a size 0. Check. That was my only one because I wanted to set something that I would actually be able to accomplish. I am pondering about my upcoming resolution. I want something else like my last one; simple, yet something that is changing me. I will post it when it is the year 2012.

In other news, I have lost a lot of weight this year. This morning when I weighed myself, I weighed in at 281. This means I have lost over 40 pounds this year. I have no exercise program. I have no diet. I just work. Because of this, I am able to fit into clothes that I haven’t been able to wear in years. This makes me happy in ways that I cannot explain.

I need to have a long weekend and come over to my parent’s house and take the time to clean up all my stuff that still occupies the basement. I know that my dad was joking, but it still struck a nerve when he was talking about my stuff still occupying the basement. So I have a few ideas on how to clear all this out. First off, I want to buy a Kindle Fire. It might be a late Christmas present to myself. I then want sort through all the books I have and see if I can find them on Amazon.com. If so, I want to buy the digital versions if possible. Now there are some books that I have that I know are not on the Amazon.com marketplace. These will be kept on a shelf; a shelf I want to buy from IKEA and place it up higher on the wall so they will not be in the way if there are more room renovations. The other books will be donated or sold or whatever is needed to rid myself of them. I have a large amount of random electronics that I would like to sort through and depart with some of them are the superfluous and just wasting space. I just am not sure what to do with my old bed frame. I mean it can be kept here for when we come and stay for the night, but I think there needs to be a separate faux guest bedroom. I am hoping that with all my clothing out of drawers on the frame, it can be used if I come and stay for a few nights or whatever.

I am waiting for the spring/summer. My dad is making himself an office. I am really excited about this because I have a hidden love for building and designing rooms/houses. So this will be a fun and exciting adventure for the two of us because we are best when we bounce the ideas off each other and we work well together. I am thinking of getting some things framed for the decorations in his office. I am thinking maybe a small shadowbox with things from his time in the Seabees and some photos from Dubuque. I think it will be a nice little place for him to relax and to do his work.

I was thinking about something while I was at work. I was thinking about my top ten favorite songs and lyrics. I think I will compile this list with some long thought and that will be in an upcoming post.

I would like to take this time to send out my sincerest condolences and sympathies and love to the Havens family. This Christmas, they lost as husband and a father. Colleen, I know you don’t read this, but all of us at Hobby Lobby Polaris are here for you. You are a member of our family and we support you.

Holy...

So long days, and short nights. This sums up my existence the past few weeks. But it will all be worth it soon. On that note, I PROMISE to put up a nice new post during Christmas weekend. It will be insightful, humorous,  full of shit, and slightly revealing. I hope you all stay tuned. I leave you with this:

Stones in your eyes,
Stones in your eyes,
Stones in your eyes,
Stones in your mouth,
Stones in your ears,
Stones in your mind,
Stones in your eyes,
Stones in your eyes,

We live in the jar and think the lid's the sky
You're hoping for a savior on your cross outside
Stars are just a million little fireflies
The sun is just a hole. What is the light outside?

Someone save me cause I
Can't keep traveling alone
Come with me to hide out
When there's nowhere that is safe tonight. 

Holding out for rest but on the seventh day,
I've created nothing and I'm wide awake,
So can I tie my key to your electric kite?
The rooster crowed twice and you kissed me goodnight.

There's too many saviors on my cross again,
I know I'm never going to be a perfect man.
Everyone's an oyster with their grain of sand,
I love you most in summer, now it has to end. 

Someone save me cause I
Can't keep traveling alone
Come with me to hide out 
When there's nowhere that is safe tonight. 
When there's nowhere that is safe tonight.

Stones in your eyes,
Stones in your eyes,
Stones in your eyes,
Stones in your eyes,
Stones in your eyes,
Stones in your eyes,
I'd run a million miles if you won first prize. 

Someone save me cause I
Can't keep traveling alone
Come with me to hide out 
When there's nowhere that is safe tonight. 
When there's nowhere that is safe tonight. 
When there's nowhere that is safe tonight.

Video Entry #2

XBMC and Our Digital Future

So here is where I’m at. I’m working on getting our digital household up and running. I am getting everything encoded into the proper format and set up for the HTPC. A desk has been added to the living room. Kate’s laptop is to reside upon this desk. We also plan to have my underused Samsung laserjet printer connected to this laptop so anyone can print out what they need. The printer can also be shared so we can print out through our computers on the network. We also have plans of purchasing a low cost Android based tablet, and using a few programs, we can use it as the input interface for the Home Theater PC. We are embracing the digital future.

Now I want to do something a little different. I want to do a small software review, based on my experiences and uses for it. Bear with me, this something I have never done before.

XBMC

XBMC is a media center program, with its roots planted in Microsoft’s XBOX gaming console. The software was only able to be installed after some form of modding and hacking. The creators then ported the program to Windows, OS X, and Linux. A Media Center program is different from a normal video player. XBMC organizes your files, watches your folders, collects data, and plays your files. I will go into detail with each one.

                When you first install XBMC, you need to set up the install. This includes telling the program where your media files are stored. XBMC will then “watch” those folders; for example if you rip more CDs to your Music folder, XBMC will “see” the new files and add them. This a great thing to have in a media center program, as you don’t have to worry about continuously adding single files in the program. Once your files are in the program, it will then “scrape” your files to collect the metadata. It will attach this data to the file within the program. This will give you information such as covers, artwork, summaries, ratings, etc. This makes it easy to see at a glance any information for the movie. From this organization and listings, you can play your files.

One of the great things about XBMC is its ability to install add ons and skins. You can browse and download and install the skin that you want to use. They are all good, but some are better for certain applications. I chose Neon, and the individual options to be used for the Home Theater. All this is set up on my desktop for now, but it will all be translated to the Home Theater. It is easy to use and navigate froma  distance. I also installed the add on that should help me configure my Windows Media Center remotes to be used with XBMC. I hope to make this our main media center application. 

Overall, I give it a 9/10. Why? For everything it does great, it lacks a few things. For one, no Netflix or Hulu integration. I am hoping that the remote customization will help create custom macros to launch Netflix and Hulu Desktop. Below are a few screenshots from my installation as it sits for now. 

I have a lot of work to do with it, mostly with getting all the correct information and files all together. I will let you in on the process, every step of the way. So long, fairwell.

Let's Hope This Works...

The Bedroom Odyssey

Captain’s Log: Wednesday, November 9, 2011.

Alright, so here is what’s happening in my world. Yesterday, I managed to cut myself twice on glass at work. It hurt like a mother fucker. But I’m better now. They are getting glued shut after being cleaned out before work. But on a better note, I have been cleaning my room. Not just picking up my clothes and shoving things away, I mean a REAL clean. I have been throwing away things and working on organizing my desk and stuff. This is all in preparation for my furniture and room décor purchases. I am purchasing a dresser from IKEA, with which I have the goal of moving all the folded clothes from the inside of my closet. I am also purchasing some nice wooden clothes hangers to replace the plastic ones that I am currently using. This is for looks, but also because the wooden ones are sturdier and they won’t be ruined when my coats are hanging on them. I plan on getting some covered storage boxes to place on the shelves in the closet. I plan on putting a lot of stuff in here, but I want it to look nice and not look like shit. I am also considering building a new bed frame for myself, platform style. This would allow me to get rid of my box spring, but I also like the look and style. What do you think? I’m redoing my room, and it looks as though we will be living here for a while. I also am going to finish my bathroom here soon in the near future. I need to purchase a matching rug, black paint, and a possibly a new showerhead because I went to adjust the direction of mine, and it came off. Soooo I am looking into replacing it soon. It still works, but I haven’t decided on if I am going to replace just the showerhead, or all the fixtures. I think that all these little improvements will make me happier in the long run. When the new furniture is purchased, I will be rearranging my room. I think my desk is going to go into the corner by the window, which my bed currently occupies. My bed will be moved to the wall between my door and closet, but not sure how it will be placed. I am leaning towards having it extend out into my room, off centered towards the closet, and relocating the wall shelf to be lower for a night stand replacement. I think the best spot for the dresser is going to be against the wall adjacent to the closet. I will be removing my current night stand, as it just isn’t working out as I had hoped. This leaves me a large amount of room available along the wall that houses the window. I am thinking about in the near future [after Christmas] of adding a futon/love seat to my room. This will allow me a place to relax and read, and a place to sit when painting and drawing. The one issue I need to resolve is where to keep my books. I like the look of having a long single shelf about 12 inches below the ceiling along the one wall. That would leave the books within reach, but give me the storage I need and room to bring other books into my life. I think I have bored you enough about my room’s future for now.

So I started my book. I had finished the covers, and I officially have one print in it! I have a few more that I need to cut down, and punch in and add. I am making this a “sample” book. I am printing on different paper, different sizes compared to the cover, cutting vs. tearing edges, velum sheets, etc. I am using this as a sample to hopefully show clients in the future that would like a photo book made. And I feel that some might like the idea of the book being custom and handmade, and not worrying about getting lost or mistakes. Once I am finished, or getting more finished in it, I will post some pictures.

And now, I must conclude this post as I need to get ready for work and eat some lunch. Have a good day, and I will be returning soon, with some surprises.

28.56489198287414

I have concluded my journey of this weekend, travelling a grand total of 874 miles [on the dot!] from my departure this past Friday morning until I filled up my gas tank at the Kroger station in town. This weekend went by waaay to fast for my liking. I enjoyed every second of it. It was an epicly awesome experience that I hope to have again this same time next year. I have made some new[ish] friends that are always good for a laugh. So here is a recap of this weekend, so you get an idea of what I accomplished this weekend.

I woke up Friday morning at 3 AM, showered, packed, and departed a little after 3:30. I arrived in Peoria at around 10:30 [I’m keeping this all in Eastern time to help alleviate confusion]. I spent the morning with Diana, and even sat in her Art History class with Sarah Glover for old time’s sake. And let me tell you, I remembered a lot for someone who rarely took notes. After class, I went to lunch with Diana at Two-25 and was served by the always wonderful Kristen “Nighthawk Feathers” Fuller. We were joined by Jerry and it was an awesome lunch. After that I went and spent a little time with Ricky and Lyndsey at their apartment. Upon my departure/kicking out, I returned the Bradley campus to getting a little tossing in with some old friends and the Baby BUFF members. We played a little Ultimate, which helped me get ready for the tournament. Up next was dinner with Manny, Sam, Matt, and Melissa at Flattop. The night was concluded with some NES repair and Super Talking Jeopardy with Mike and Jackie. The next day held tournament play. We played 4 games, in which we lost two hard fought games and won the other two pretty handily. I returned to the place of stay and showered for my dinner date with Laura and Emily. We ate at TGI Fridays and hung out a little at Emily’s pretty sweet place of residence. The night concluded once again of some Super Talking Jeopardy. Today [Sunday], I woke up sore, and not moving well. We played our first game in which we should have won, but handed the game away after halftime. The next team we were to play didn’t have enough that wanted to stay and play in the rain, and many [including me] had long drives ahead of us and wanted to get going early. But not after the customary team lunch afterwards. We invaded this little place that all the old people love to go to and just took over. I think the waitress loved us because we were all just in a good mood and had a great sense of humor. After the amazing stuffed French toast, I departed for home. I made the trip in less than 6 hours. No real traffic, no detours, no construction slowdowns. Just smooth sailing. And here I am now, just writing this up in the comfort of my own room once again.

I am starting something for myself. I am calling it my “Life Enhancement Program”. And it is just starting to do small simple things to make not only myself a better person, but to make my life better in general. The first thing I have been working on consistently doing is brushing my teeth every night and every morning. I know this seems too simple, but in college and high school, I had a real failure to brush my teeth consistently. This is step number one. Step number two is to make Sunday laundry day. I will now have Sundays off, so this would be the perfect day to do laundry. And if I do it every week, then it will not get out of hand. My next project within this program is my room decorating. I have asking Jayme for help so I can get some personal touches in this room. I asked her to design some 12.5”x12.5” prints for me; I have some vinyl records that I want to frame. We sell some ones at Hobby Lobby that essentially hold two vinyls; but instead of two in a frame, I am putting in one with a designed print in the other half. And I have some other ones I might frame in single vinyl record frames. I also have my Beatles poster here; I just need to hang it. But before I do any hanging, I will need to repair the holes in the wall and repaint. This way I can have a fresh start and hang artwork where I want it. I think my one wall will be my “Beatles Wall”, and I think I have that wall picked out. It is a smaller wall, but not the smallest one; and the [at least] three frames will cover the area nicely without being too cluttered. So I think that is it for now.

Oh, and I got a new phone. I am working on getting it perfect for myself, and when I do, I will be showing it off to you all!

Also, the title is my average gas mileage for my trip :D

All Smiles and Sunshine, A Perfect World On A Perfect Day

I would like to apologize for the delay of a new posting. I had been meaning to update, but have been lazy/busy. So here is the rundown of what I want to cover: The Giver, The Great Indoors, Rainmeter, Moving Forward.

The Giver:

I finished the book and I loved it. The ending is what you expect and want to happen when you are reading upto the final pages. I don't want to give away the ending, as I would recommend that you read the book. But it teaches us to not settle for the status quo. We need to challenge what we are, which is the truth, indoctrinated to think/know/believe/act. I have discussed before the need to destroy the traditional gender roles and blur the line between male and female. We need to challenge ourselves to be a better person and give other people a better life. Jonas chose to take matter into his own hands. He turned his back to this "perfect" community and left. He gained knowledge of a matter that he had always thought was a simple and sometimes joyous occasion. He finally knew the truth and decided that it wasn't something he wanted to ever be apart of again. He helped prevent the same fate from happening to an innocent boy. We all could learn many lessons from this novel and I want everyone to read it. And it is only 179 pages long. Can be read in like 4 hours.

The Great Indoors:

I am resigning from the Great Indoors. I was offered a better work situation that I must take. It will be better for me in the long run, and I am looking forward to the change.

Rainmeter:

I redesigned the rainmeter skin on my desktop. I am working on changing the wallpaper to help tie everything in together as I want it to. It will be using my current wallpaper, but edited to create something a little less distracting, and easier to read some of the text elements. I will upload a new screenshot when it is finished.

Moving Forward:

Now where do I go from here? I am just moving forward with my head held high. I purchased some new items for my bathroom. I bought a brushed nickel finish towel rod, a glass shelf with a brushed nickel finish brackets, black fabric shower curtain, a white fabric shower curtain liner, two spa rug towels [one black, one grey], and two spa hand towels [one black, one grey], and new shower curtain hangers. I will be purchasing the following in the future: a dresser from IKEA, a wall shelf from IKEA, a shower curtain rod, and frames to help complete the decoration of my room and bathroom. I am hoping that by purchasing a dresser, I will be able to get most, if not all, the clothes out of my closet and use those shelves as a storage space. This will help clear up and help keep my room clean in the long run. I will be bringing my Beatles framed poster, and reframing the one larger poster frame contents. I have a vinyl record, and some smaller graphic design pieces that Jayme made for me. I will be looking at a few varieties of frames with mutli opening mats. I will try to keep the same frame theme throughout the rest to keep everything matching. I will also be using some drywall filler to fill in the smaller holes from pre-exisiting wall shelves and magazine rack. I am hoping that this all works out and makes it a little better place for me in the long run.

I think I have covered everything I wanted to cover in this update. I will be uploading hoepfully more often in the near future as things settle down a little.

The Giver

So I was reading the Giver today while I was getting my tattoo worked on. I almost finished the book. So far, here are my thoughts on this classic novel.

1. Jonas is assigned the best job in the entire Community they live in, bar none.

2. He needs to fuck the shit out of Fiona, or at least run away and start an awesome life with her.

3. I would *die* in a world without any color.

4. My freedom of choice is what makes me, me.

5. I would loathe not being able to get my piercings and tattoos.

6. No cars and riding bikes everywhere in a place that allows adequate bike parking? I love it.

7. Being considered an adult at age 12 [although you may be younger/older] is historically correct, but still a little fucked up.

8. Having a coat that buttons on the back is even more fucked up.

9. Not knowing my birth mother would drive me insane.

10. How are the Birthmothers inpregnanted?

I will have an update when I finish the book [30 pages left] that has my complete thoughts.

Man Vs Woman Vs The Nerd

Gender equality. It is kind of the holy grail of the american workplace. But there is no possible way that this will be possible at any point in the near future. I am saying this with a certainty that comes from first hand experiences. There is a big difference between words and their actions. I hear from women [in general] that they want to be equal in the workplace. I see equality in the workplace as the same pay between both genders that are in the same position and/or job level. I also see it as a man and woman being able and being responsible to preform the same tasks. I hear from co-workers that a man should not be forced to clean the women's restrooms. But when it comes to actually cleaning the restrooms, a female worker will not touch them. Not even when it comes to replacing toilet paper, replacing the soap, or changing the air freshener. This morning was a good example. Last night, someone's child dropped some raisins or gummy bears, or something else that is sticky. So instead of cleaning it up the prior night at closing like it should have been, it was left there. So this morning I was called by a coworker to come up and clean the mess up. Normally, this wouldn't faze me. But I am training in the frameshop, and I need all the help I can get. I nicely told the coworker that I was training in the frameshop. So I get called by the store manager to clean up the mess. So I ended up cleaning up the mess. But I don't understand why another worker couldn't clean up the mess. There was at least 5 other workers there that were capable enough to get the mop and clean up the mess. I feel that I should not be taken away from some very important training to deal with this matter when there are capable people available. Now don't get upset about the whole "what is good for the whole" or in the words of Spock: "The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or one." Yes, yes, yes I understand. But why am I the one who is specifically targeted to do anything that others seem to see as "below" them? I understand that I was responsible for these duties in the past. But moving forward in the future I will be a framer. A very welcome change to my current position at Hobby Lobby. Don't get me wrong. I don't see anything as below me, at all. I just am tired of having to clean up after others and cover their ass all the fucking time. I also feel that all workers should be held responsible and everyone should be held to the same standard. This means that if one department is held to a standard, then people from other departments should be held to that same standard. For those who don't know, I work in the stockroom at the Great Indoors, alongside my other job at Hobby Lobby. We are being asked by the store manager to do our best to keep the main isle of our stockroom clear. We keep it clear, it makes it not only look better, but who wants to work in a trashed place? No one. But then there are others who come in and leave a fucking mess in the main isle of the stockroom. We [We, being the men of MPU] have decided not to clean up their mess. Why? Because they wouldn't clean up a mess if we left one in their store department. It is by the people who come into the dock area with a cart full of trash and cardboard all mixed together, leave it, and grab an empty one; all while trying not to be noticed. But if we were to try something like this, we would be held responsible for our actions and be made to sort through the trash and cardboard, and empty our cart. A worker should not get away with this "man's work" just because she is an attractive female.

I would like to move onto a different subject at this time. For those who do not know, I am a nerd. I would like to define the term. I am going to be using Gordon Mah Ung's definition: "...being a nerd was never about pocket protectors, the math club, or poor fashion decisions. It was about having an intense passion for a subject matter." In this sense, I am a nerd about many subjects. I want to direct this towards the PC aspect of my nerdom. I personally own 4 currently working PCs. Three of these computers are rocking Windows 7 Home Premium, and the last one is my trusty workhorse, my Mac G5. I love my computers. I have named two of them: Charlemagne, and Athena. Athena is my laptop, named after the Greek Goddess. In traditional Grek mythology, Athena is the "...goddess of wisdom, courage, inspiration, civilization, warfare, strength, strategy, female arts, crafts, justice, and skill"*. My laptop has been through a lot with me, and is my mobile work station with Photoshop CS4. She is also used for my web design and editing through Dreamweaver CS4. My desktop [the one I am currently tuping this on] is my baby, Charlemagne. Charlemagne is often described as a tall, strong Frank with red hair. The tower for this computer is a very large tower, and the shipping weight was over 50 pounds. He has be painted red and black, to match the historic man. Charlemagne rose to power as the Holy Roman Emperor, and revided the Western Roman Empire. This computer started out as a mederately speedy one with two words in mind: budget build. It was my first building. Since then He has evolved and beomce more powerful than I could have ever dreamed of when I first placed the Dual-Core Athlon CPU into the Biostar motherboard. This computer is used for playing games [though not so much lately] to encoding movies and dvds into files for the HTPC. The HTPC currently lacks a name. S/he is white with a key lime green trim piece. I am more inclined to use historical figures in my names. The Mac G5 also lacks a name, but I am currently thinking of one for her. Like I said, I like historical figures. Cathrine the Great has always been of interest to me since I first learned about her. For those who are unaware, Catherine the Great was a ruler of the Russian Empire. "Under her direct auspices the Russian Empire expanded, improved its administration, and continued to modernize along Western European lines. Catherine's rule re-vitalized Russia, which grew stronger than ever and became recognized as one of the great powers of Europe. She had successes in foreign policy and sversaw sometimes brutal reprisals in the wake of rebellion."** I am choosing this name because this Mac is a powerhouse that cannot be stopped. She was recently revitalized with a nice new paint job, and soon will be given new fans to cool her beyond what the factory fans could ever dream of. And to top it all off, the outer shell is painted blue, the color of royalty! I am getting to my point, I promise. My point is that I am a nerd. I am proud of it. I have a passion, and I love that passion. Not many people name their computers. Many people name their cars, because we expect to drive them until they fall apart, if permitting. I don't put my computers out to pasture. I revitalize them. Maybe a new hard drive here. A new paint job there. A fresh OS install. If they become too slow for me to use how I want them, I will clean them up, get a mint install, and find a new home. I don't want used computers to be put out to pasture. I want them to be used and loved half as much as I loved them. They can be used as a learning tool. In the ending moments that I owned my last laptop, I installed Ubuntu and experimented. Linux really improved the experience, but I was relegated to installing Windows XP [as much I protested] so my father could use it in favor of the crash prone Pentium 4 Dell he was driving. I think that when the Mac is replaced or I get so far behind the OS X cycle, I will look for compatible software to turn it into a server. I mean, all I need to do is replaced the 400GB drives with a couple 2+ TB drives to give it a lot of storage for my visual media. And who doesn't love a good home server? It can be put in a corner, maybe out in the garage, the basement, or a storage closet. Doesn't need a monitor, mouse or keyboard. Doesn't need to be high powered, and power save mode with a LAN wakeup enabled will help give a nice central spot to host your media. And if you set it up correctly, if it is in a accessable place, pop in the that brand new CD and it will rip the tracks and add it to your library so everyone can listen to it. As you can see, I'm rambling now. But it is all because of my love for what I am talking about. So if someone calls you a nerd, tell then thank you. And be proud of it. Don't hide your passion. Let it shine out, and help educate others.

*From Wikipedia: Athena

**From Wikipedia: Catherine the Great

To Do List

I have had a lot on my mind lately. I have been working a lot, which leaves little time to do my other stuff that I want to do. Here is a short list of what I want to do. By the way, this is in no particular order:

1. Starry Night Photography

2. New fans, mouse, tablet for my Mac

3. Paint

4. Clean

I need to find a day when I have the time to run to Micro Center early in the morning and get what I need to buy. I need to buy a new Bamboo tablet because my pen fell in some water, and refuses to work correctly. And I have become used to using it with editing, and I can use Illustrator to add a little depth to the photos. I also wanna pick up some blue LED fans to replace the stock, bland grey ones in the Mac. I also need a mouse to use with the Mac when I don't want to use the tablet to navigate. So one and two go together in a sense.

I have some canvases in my closet and I want to start painting again. I don't have anything in mind, to be honest. I just want to work it again. I have a day off coming up, so I think I might sit out in the garage and paint some. I might find it relaxing, and it might help me out. I have a full array of oil paints, and I have some spray paint to add to the mix. Who knows what will come of it... but good or bad, I will enjoy it.

I need to clean up a lot. Well, it is isn't that bad. I just really need to clean my desk and shampoo the carpet. So it isn't all that bad. I just need a few hours to sit down and do it.

I am going to start exploring some new ways to present my work. I remember this process from drawing class, and I am thinking of picking up some low grade matte paper to use for it. The process involves taking a printed photo, and using lighter fluid to transfer it to another sheet of paper. It gives it a pretty unique look, and I think I might try this out again, but with one of my printed photos. I wanna have the sketchy look to it, maybe like a film grain look. I might then take that, and add some paint, cyan, and some other shit. I am excited to see how it all turns out. If it looks great, or looks like shit, I am just excited to try something new. If it works out, I think I might be on to something! Don't get me wrong... I can just as easily add all this in in Photoshop. But I like to try something else and I like being more involved in the entire process. I will wait up all night just to finish one print that I work with it all the way through. It is just a little more satisfying that way to me.

I am still waiting to hear back about my tattoo design from Jojo. I am getting killed by this wait. I need to ride on down to Inspired and see where he is at with it. Hopefully at least maybe I can get the outline soon. Then the details and color in a couple days later or whatever. I just want the tattoo!!!!!!

Alright, it is time to lay down, and peace out.

Pink/Blue

Yesterday and today I was tasked with hanging up Christmas ornaments onto pewgs while at work. Now, this is not a difficult task, just boring and tedious. But something had caught my attention. And this theme resonated throghout the entire Hobby Lobby store. The theme: Indoctrination. It is simple. But this is not just something that is found at Hobby Lobby. It is found throughout our entire society. Now I'm not talking about something big. It is simple. Something so small as color. I have this theory that color can influence people more than anything. I try to use this when I practice my photography. If something can stand on its own without the use of vivid and eye popping color, then it is worth being shown. But back to the color indoctrination that I encounter when I work. How many of you associate light blue with baby boys, and light pink with baby girls? Think about it. In movies, television, pop culture, our stores: pink and blue are the go-to two colors used to identify the sex of a baby. Not green. Not yellow. Not red. Not violet. Not white. Not black. Not orange. Why do we constantly use these two colors? It was introduced as a marketing scheme, as I'm sure. Think about it. People know that if you buy pink clothing, you are having a baby girl. Blue shit? A baby boy. "What color are you painting the nursery?" "Blue." "Congrats on the baby boy!" At Hobby Lobby we sell frames that have the cutout replicate the shape of a classic sonogram. We carry two styles, if you will: one with light pink plaid, the other with light blue plaid. All the baby themed frame are divided between two styles, spare a few that are just plain silver. This theme carries over to the area that sells decor for children's rooms. Everything is pink or blue. What really brought this to the forefront of my brain was the comment yesterday: "People will know that pink is for girls and blue is for boys." Now that is fine and dandy. We, as humans, like to have certain colors associated with certain themes, topics, or places. I just feel that is it just a bad thing to continue this trend of pink=girls and blue=boys. Cause this leads to bad fashion trends like guys trying to be "real men" or "tough" start wearing pink everything, including shirts that state "Real men wear pink". No one gives a shit about that. Wear what you want, no matter what people might think. What people say doesn't matter. If someday I have a child, I will try my damnest to avoid the pink/blue cliche. Hopefully I will be with a girl who will feel the same, or at least will hear out my arguement against picking them automatically. I will admit that my room currently is blue and white. But my favorite color is blue. I might pick blue as the color for my nursery. But I know that blue is a calming color. Red is a great color, just not my favorite. I love certain shades and hues, and I love those specific ones matched with a white trim. I love color. I honestly do. But I also know that too much color can be distracting and change our perception of things. I was taught this in Photography class: We were forced to set our desktop background to a neutral gray. Why? Because by setting it close to 18% gray [which is middle tone Zone V, which is the Average Meter Reading for photography] will set up our eyes to match what the camera sees. It also prevents images from appearing too dark or too bright, depending on our background. It sets us up for neutral. We don't adjust well when we have certain associations with a certain color. One big example of this is the Boise State Broncos football field. Football fields are normally green, with white stripes and numbers. Boise State's is blue with the white stripes and numbers; this cause some people [DAD] complain that the game is "too difficult to watch". It is not diffcult; just not what he is used to. It happens. Here is something that I wonder if people will catch: Leave a comment with what is your favorite color, and what you think about the pink/blue baby world.

Tequila Juice

So I'm a little....intoxicated. That is something I think I should point out right off the bat. I am getting tired and when I'm drunk and alone, I get sad and depressed. Why? Because it is seeming that everyone but me is finding their "true love". I don't care about the "right girl" right now. I'm just looking forward to a day when a girl who I ask out on a date decides that she is going to show up and go on the date with me. It has come to the point where I make a back up plan for when she doesn't show up or ignores me the days leading up to the supposed date. Here is a little secret: When I am asking you out on a date, I'm not asking for a long relationship and you have to make a decision right now. I am asking you for a chance. I like you. So I want to take you out and get to know you a little better. You know, have a good time. What ends up happening though is that I end up with Plan B. And it hits really hard when you realize that this girl doesn't like me enough to get a free dinner and a free movie. And all you have to do is fucking show up. What the fuck is so hard about that? Not only is it fucking rude, it fucking hurts. I take it hard. I won't talk to people. After Katie stood me, which I thought she would never do, I didn't eat or sleep for almost 72 hours. I worked in my darkroom. I told myself that it wasn't her fault. I told myself and others that it was my fault for asking her out on a date. And the really fucked up part of it all is that to this day I will take responsibility and take the blame for everything. Girl doesn't show up for a date. It's cool, cause it is my fault for bothering her and asking her out. Girl dumps me over a phone call. Fine, because I obviously did something to deserve it. Girl rejects me off the bat. Whatever, she's too good for me; out of my league. I'm starting to look at this and wondering "why am I covering for them?" I should be holding them responsible. But for some reason I can't. I am holding onto it all which becomes part of this self destructive spiral I am working my way down. I try to stay positive, and someone is helping me do that. But the problem is that it is the girl that I currently like, and she is for the most part unavailable. It is whatever, I suppose.

Bottom line. Fuck it. Why try so hard when you know the outcome? I can talk to a girl and try to get her to like me, or I can just be me. I choose to be me. If a girl can't like me for me, or like me at my worst, then it is obvious that she doesn't really like me. She likes a part of me; but not everything that I am. I don't know what the future holds for me, but here are a few things that will never change: I will never cheat on you. I can be found most friday and weekend nights alone in my room. I take pride in my work. I will be the one who comes into your work just to say Hi. If you can't seem to handle that, let me know so I can stop wasting time for the both of us.

Forearms, Tattoos, and a Shitty Screen Recorder

First things first. I am getting a tattoo. I have talked to the artist, and we came up with an idea. I need to take him a few things so he can get a better idea because I want some things to be as realistic as possible. I'm super excited. For those wondering, it will be a photography themed tattoo. It will be residing on my left forearm, and from the idea and sizes, it will take up most of my forearm, and maybe my entire arm. Awesome!

I have been trying to do another How-To. But this one is supposed to be a video one, because I want to add that to my blog. The problem is that the screen recorder is a little rough. I think I know audio issues. I need to speak louder. I just want you all to bear with me because I don't have the resources to edit the video to get rid of the rough patches. I might look into that so I can make it all shiney and pretty for you guys! The topic is ripping DVDs to your hard drive so you can watch them on your computer, or ship them off to your iPod, iPhone, Zune, Android, or Windows Mobile phone. If this is of interest to you, comment on it below.

Last but not least, I think it might be about time for making a few trips. I will be making the trip to Illinois first , maybe next month. Next up will be Pennsylvania, maybe in October. This will spread them out a little so I can recover from the financial hit. But it will all be worth it. I am hoping to surprise people for some sweet Ultimate and some drinking around town. I am giving the How-To another shot tomorrow before I resort to screen shots and maybe some Audio. You will have to wait and see.

Attraction Is A Fatal Disease.

Attraction is a funny thing. There are no rules. There is no real rhyme or reason why there is an initial attraction. You think that you like type A but then you find yourself attracted to this type B person. It seems that no matter what type of person you like you always seem to end up being attracted at some point to the exact opposite. But then there are time where you find yourself attracted to a person either only physically or attracted to their personality. But there is a time when you find yourself attracted to a person and it develops a little further, what younger people will call a crush. For the sake of consistancy, I will continue with the same syntax. This happened to me recently. I didn't want it to. It just happened. I was talking to this girl after her boyfriend broke up with her for a fucking stupid reason. And it upset me because she is a good friend and she doesn't deserve to be treated like that. I was talking to her pretty much all day and most of the night to try and get her mind off of the shit he did. I was attempting to be a good friend and help her through this hard time. Just after talking to her for a few weeks, it kinda turned into flirting a little. Nothing wrong with a little harmless flirting, as far as I'm concerned. But then it happened. It felt like a giant brick wall hit me. I had a crush on her. I really liked her personality. The thing is I haven't seen her in years. I mean in like over 4 years. I know what you are thinking: How can you have a crush on a girl you haven't seen in over 4 years? I don't know how it happened. But it did. But just in my way of doing things, I've attempted to destroy it and get rid of the crush. Why? There is no point in having a crush on a girl who is practically unavailable. "Huh?" is what you are saying right now. How can someone be single but unavailable. She didn't want to date anyone after being with him for a few years. It makes sense, but it just adds to this dilemma for me. And I have to stop and ask myself: Why do I always like the girls who are unavailable? Is it a mental thing for me? Do I do it so that I know that they are unavailable, so I won't take a chance and ask them out, and therefore won't feel rejected? Or do I just have bad luck. I know what you think it is. I will tell you what I think it is: I feel it is both. Like 90/10 split. The 90 part being the mental part of knowing that they are unavailable so I will continue to feel safe. Rejection is a part of life. Some experience it more than others. I have a rocky past with girls. I know I do. I've been an asshole to girls. I've tried being the friend to girls. It's been a tough road. I've been trying to recover and find myself and everything. I did something that I usually don't do. I told this girl I had a crush on her. I normally don't reveal that to anyone; half the time I try to convince myself that it is not real and quell it. She seemed surprised by it, but it quickly turned back into the reaffirming dread I had: She didn't want to date anyone. And that is fine with me. I knew that maybe someday in the near future, she might have a change of heart and find her way to me. But then it all came crashing down on me. Her ex came back into town. Knowing that she still had feelings for him, my heart sank. But then my defective, messed up head took over. It decided that it was time to put an end to this uncertainty and risk-taking once and for all. Why be attracted to anyone? This makes me think of the novel "The Giver". It portrays a world where everyone has their purpose. You are groomed for your purpose. Women have the opportunity to become child bearers. It seems like a much simpler world than the one where we live. According to Feminists and females politicians, this world is run by men and women are not equal, blah blah blah. While it is true that the business world is dominated by men, and the political world to a certain extent is also dominated by men, there is a whole other side to this world that women have their claws dug in, and they are dug in deep. That is the emotional world. They can claim that chivalry is dead. It is, to a certain extent. But that was set in motion by women themselves. This need to be equal in everything has been historically off-putting to men. Wanna be equal? Open your own damn door. That is not the attitude I have. But it is an example of things. But then when it comes to romance and dating, it is the common belief that men have the responsibility for everything that involves dating and romance. The guy is expected to pick the girl up. The guy is expected to pay. The guy is expected to plan everything. It is the guy who always gets in trouble every year that he does not plan something big and extravagant for the anniversary. It is the guy who is supposed to take the chance and ask the girl out. Why is always falling on us? I mean I don't mind planning everything making it fun. I like knowing what I have planned so I can tease the girl and have some fun with it. What is discouraging is when girls constantly compare what you do to their friend's dates or boyfriends and basically saying "Try harder cause you're not doing good enough". And it also is discouraging that we have to take the chance on a girl and there are girls out there who just want to defeat men and make them feel like nothing. Why don't girls ask guys out? I will tell you why: their mothers. Mothers implant into their little princess' head that for a guy to be good enough, he has to do this, this, and this. And let's be honest. Most of the guys in the world cannot live up to those high expectations. I know that I can't. I don't have the money to take a girl out on an expensive date. I try to plan on a budget, but making it fun. I trying to figure out what my girl likes, and play to that. I would much rather cook dinner for a girl than try to impress her by taking her to a fancy restraunt. And by fancy I mean the Tilted Kilt. Oh, by the way girls, if you don't like dogs, and by dogs I mean German Shepherds, don't apply here. Because I will have a German Shepherd, and she will be protective, and she will be my best friend and will always come first. I will have a king size bed so she can sleep there with me. So get used to the idea. If you try to get between me and her, I will not hesitate to severe the relationship. And when it is her time, yes I will cry like a newborn baby. No one will ever do anything to seperate me from my dog. I keep her with me everywhere I go. She will be missed. I loved her, and I still do. She was my best friend no matter what was happening in this world. She didn't want to leave. She fought until I told her it was okay. I still have scars from you, baby girl. You are missed more and more everyday. Still ate that pizza just like when you were a puppy. I remember our first night together. You slept in my bed; me on the floor. You were more than a dog. You were everything to me. I hated not being able to take you with me to college. I missed you the most while away. I always welcome the bleeding and the licks and everything. You were my BEST FRIEND. Always and forever. I Love You.

The Mac Is Back.

The Mac Is Back! Wooooo! I have officially disassembled, painted, and successfully reassembled my Power Mac G5. The paint has a few small nicks and scratches from when I was working on the assembly. The computer was a pain in the ass to take apart and put back together. It is a well crafted and well engineered piece of machinery. Everything fits together in a certain way and only in one way. I like it though. It was a challenge. I do not consider the Mac to be finished. I will be buying some new fans to use that have some nice bright LEDs in them. I will also be using my remaining two PCI Expnasion slots for two fan controllers. I'm looking forward to getting everything going again and using this powerful machine. I will be working on a screenshot tour of my Mac, and how I have it set up. I will be working on customizing the desktop like I have my Windows one set up.

I have a question: Why do guys treat their girlfriends like shit? I don't understand. They have this beautiful, smart, wonderful girl, and they treat her like shit. Why? Do they have make her feel bad to make themselves feel better? Even after all the shit they go through for you? Like moving across the country to be with you? I don't understand the need to make your girlfriend, the girl you supposidly love, feel like shit. I do hope and pray that she smartens up and leaves your ass and finds a guy who will treat her like she deserves. I do the little things for a girl and she thinks I'm the nicest guy in the world. Why doesn't every guy do those little things for girls? I know that we are not in the age of Knights and the damsel in distress. But why be an asshole? There is no need for it. And what else pisses me off is that the girls aren't fucking smart enough to get the fuck out of there. WHy be with a guy who treats you like shit? Don't give me the "But I love him" bullshit. You are just afraid to take charge and find someone better. And there is someone better out there for you. Sometimes the guy is right in front of you. Sometimes it is your best friend who is secretly in love with you but decides to keep it secret because he knows that you won't leave the asshole. Or he is with you time and time again as your parade through a bunch idiots who don't know how to treat a girl. I just don't know what to think about this whole romance and dating thing anymore. It seems that I see everyone pairing off and finding someone. But it seems to elude me. I fully subscribe to the theory that some people are destined to be alone forever. It is just math. But I'm finished with that now.

I'm ready for Friday. Day off. Relaxing. I'm excited. Maybe something good will come out of it.

$100 Million

The classic question: What would you do with $100 Million? I was thinking about this after a dream that I had which involved me waking up to $30 million in my bank account. So here is a list of what I would do with my money:

1: I would buy some cars. Seriously. I would pay off my sister's Subaru, and sell her Malibu and replace it with an Subaru Legacy. Great on gas, and a lot of power. Now for my cars. I would return my Saturn to my Dad, because that was the deal. I would then buy myself a few cars. I would have my "everyday" driver car, a sporty "show off" car, and my work vehicle. My everyday car would be a custom Ford Shelby GT500. It would be all black. No classic Shelby stripes. I would remove all the emblems that mark it as a GT500. It would be black on black on black. Black exterior, black interior, black wheels. I would have the white headlights to make it intimidating. I would be powerful but not showy. I would also buy a brand new Corvette ZR1. Blue. 'Nuff said. My work truck would be a brand new Chevy Suburban. 4 Wheel Drive power house. Will do everything I need to do. I would consider a 4 door sedan, which would be a Dodge Charger, Supercharged.

2: I would pay my bills forward. I mean insurance, phone, electric, gas, internet, rent. All paid until the lease ends. I would then buy a cheaper house and work on it while living at the apartment. I would make it my own. I have certain design ideas that I would incorporate througout the house. I love the combination of thick, white trim and crown molding, with a solid darker hue as the wall paint.

3: College debts would be paid off. Enough said.

These are the top three things I would do with my money. I feel that this is pretty reasonable. I don't feel like the cars are too outragous. I don't plan on being that douchebag who just won a shit load of money. I would be just keep it quiet and do my thing. I would love to pull up to work in an all black Shelby GT500. It would be loud, aggressive, and impressive. The Charger would be just as loud. The Corvette would not be taken to work, unless just for a visit. It would be taken out for a cruise and I would have fun with it. Coupe all the way. I would need the suburban for all the drywall I plan on buying for the house. I have it all figured out. I would use my money wisely after a short spending spree. But I would love it.

Rainmeter has returned!

After a rocky few weeks, I have finally managed to get a stable installation of Windows up and running. I was working on other things, but have finally managed to get Rainmeter installed and configured the way that I want. I'm going to give you some screenshots and a concise walkthrough on how and why everything is set up the way it is. I would like to note that this setup is not concrete and I am currently looking for a Recycle Bin replacement and I am open to anything new and exciting. Here is what my desktop did look like. Simple, clean, with the programs that I used the most pinned to the Taskbar and Start Menu.

I changed the desktop wallpaper to something a little more colorful than what I'm used to. I found it in Lifehacker's Wallpaper Wednesday.

I added my trusty corner clock which not only has the time, but the date and day of the week. It is easy to read and can be changed to be in any corner of your screen. I used one of MaximumPC's Small But Powerful: 30 Useful Apps Under 2MB ColorCop (which can be found on page 2) to match the CornerClock to the color of the straws on the wallpaper. I added a little transparency to make it a little more visually appealing.

I added my iPhone like icons, Flurry by David Lanham. I chose these because there is a large amount available, and they are available as .png files in various sizes. I used IcoFX to select the size I wanted and so I could easily preview them. I used Microsoft's Paint application to create the black vertical bar, which is just to give a little separation and a little more visual interest. I positioned them to the right above the clock, which opens a large amount of white space to work on the left side.

I Pinned the same programs to the start menu, and I ordered them the same way as on the desktop. My next step is to program the Macro keys on my Microsoft Sidewinder X4 keyboard. I need to figure out my 6 most used programs from this list so I can program them a little later.

[UPDATE]:I would like to make a quick update to my previous post "How-To: Media Organization". I was thinking about this while on my way home from work last night. One great reason to have a different folder to each movie is that we live in a digital age. We all have mobile devices that support. The single movie title per folder is great if you have multiple versions of the same movie. I personally have versions for my Zune, Desktop, and my DEVOUR. This just helps keep all the video files organized and easy to find.